It's the Tuesday after memorial day. I had an unexpected very nice weekend. A wonderful man--guess who--and dear friend called me to take me to a casino on Saturday night and I won $160.00! Wow! More importantly I got to see his face :) Yes, gushy I know.
I've actually tried to let go of my feelings for him and they just don't go away so I have decided to embrace what I feel and let it be what it's going to be. In this way I am like turtle.
Turtle is the mother, the womb, life, grounding. When I think of turtle I think of "slow and steady wins the race." But what happens during the slow and steady? Life and all the little tidbits that if I was rushing or not accepting I would be missing. This man is someone I care about deeply--our friendship being the most important part of our relationship to me. If I had not accepted him for himself and instead gotten mad at him for being in a different place than me, I would have lost him as a friend and that would have been the real tragedy.
Turtle carries her protection with her. She goes through life knowing that she has everything she needs at any given moment and she quietly goes with the flow, experiencing all there is to experience and knowing that she is fully protected from any permanent damage. Turtle lets me know that I am never alone, allows me to ground myself, and helps me to see each experience, even if it's painful as something to learn from. Turtle knows exactly who she is and expresses it without ego. Turtle medicine has gotten me through many things this past year and I am eternally grateful to her for that.
This man in my life is a very special person and I am meant to learn something from him still or I would not still have the feelings I have. Will the lesson be hard--it already has been--that is where he ends and I begin--but it has made me grow and turtle has been there with me to give me the protection of her shell when I have needed it.
Until next time......
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