Getting what you need

Blogs--what a name. Sounds like Bogs. Bogs are where cranberries are grown and unless you grew up on Cape Cod you probably didn't know that. Bogs also remind me of somewhere cold and foggy where you might see vampires or werewolves on a full moon.

Thought I would give this a try. I like to write and like to write my thoughts so I guess this is the "new" way of doing it.

I've gone through several transitions in the past year. Became divorced from a 20 year marriage where my husband was an alcoholic and cheated on me. Fell in love with a wonderful man that I met online shortly after my divorce but since have found we are in very different places in our lives. Still in love. But the way I want to be loved is to be accepted and cherished for who I am and where I'm at so that's what I'm practicing. He touches my soul and fills me with happiness every time I think of him or hear from him. I miss his face and my hand resting in his.

Have three beautiful children. My oldest has chosen a very difficult path with drugs. When I think of it I cry. He doesn't let me know what he's doing. I think it's his way of being a man and protecting me even though his judgment is not right with that. I don't see him much but he is still a gift. My other 2 children seem to be doing OK and I try not to worry but they have been through a lot too and I am keeping my eyes and ears open.

I am a Pagan. Earth based spirituality. I rely on animal totems (Raven and Crow being very prevalent) for enlightenment. I use Tarot as well although I'm new to that. I believe what I project out into the Universe is what will be sent back to me.

Many of the things that have happened in the past 2 years threw me into a tailspin. When I met the man I am in love with now it grounded me--it took a little bit--the spinning had to slow down at it's own pace. I think that's why I fell in love with him. He was my life raft in the storm. Only the second man in my life who I felt could see and touch my soul and my ex-husband was not the other one--my Nanu was. The Universe sent him to me (upon my request) to ground me and show me the lessons I need to learn. The primary lessons have been patience and unconditional love. These are hard lessons for me but I am so much happier having to learn them. We are just good friends for right now--but the love has not faded. I am so grateful he came into my life.

You can't always get what you want, but sometimes, you might find, you get what you need.